Whenever I find myself in a situation that is stressful, I have three mantras to live by. Actually, I use the three mantras for nearly every situation where I find myself questioning what to do. I feel that having mantras to guide myself by are important because they can help me stay calm and collected.
I can have terrible anxiety and I find myself in awkward social situations due to it. I have found that creating these mantras has helped me to deal with life because they help me focus on the stress I deal with and put everything into perspective as well as help change my attitude and outlook on what is going on.
The first of my mantras is my oldest. I have been using it for over a year now and I have found that it works very well. This mantra, which is phrased as a question, has helped me through many situations. It is "Will this matter in ten years?". This has helped me to put my priorities into place, helped anger melt away, and helped me when I felt that I was being treated with less respect than I should be. For example, when I was applying to college, I had a lot of schoolwork and other extracurricular responsibilities, so I would ask myself "Will this matter in ten years?". When the situation was something such as looking at colleges or filling out the Common Application, the answer was "yes", so I continued what I was doing and took a deep breath. However, when the answer was "no" I would let the stress go away because if it had nothing to do with my future, why bother?
Sometimes people tried to use the mantra against me. I told them about it and they thought it was ridiculous. When I would get stressed about something small, they would jokingly ask "Will it matter in ten years?". While they were being sarcastic, I took the statement seriously and by verbally stating this mantra, they often helped me to realize when I was overreacting and that I just needed to let the small things go.
This mantra helps me a lot in college. When I have a lot on my plate and I have to focus, I ask myself "Will it matter in ten years?". For example, when I went to change my major and I was extremely nervous about doing so, I asked myself that question. It gave me the motivation to go and talk to the professors I had never met in the building I had never been in before because I knew that I would regret not doing so in ten years. "Will this matter in ten years?" is one of my favorite questions and my oldest mantra.
My second mantra also has to do with stress. It is a quote from my favorite book Jane Eyre by Charlotte Bronte. I could go on for hours about why this is my favorite book and why every woman should read it, but that is aside from the point. My second mantra is the quote, "Life appears to me too short to be spent nursing animosity and registering wrongs". I tend to become stressed very easily and it often causes me to become angry at everyone around me. If I am stressed and someone wrongs me or otherwise does something to make me mad, I recite this mantra. It helps me put everything into perspective. If I spend my time thinking about the way that someone has hurt me or dwell on why I should dislike them, I am wasting my time. I do not forget what they have done to me, but to spend time thinking about it is to give them the time of day. It is a waste, in my opinion, to spend time even thinking about someone who has hurt you because you could use that time focusing on the positive people in your life instead. This is my second mantra because it helps anger melt away.
My final mantra is my favorite and it is "Natural Smile, Soft Eyes". I have a tendency to have an angry resting face. When I am thinking or I am not reacting to anything, I tend to look like I am upset. I also have problems with my eyesight which sometimes cause me to squint my eyes, especially when I am wearing contacts. I use this mantra to show the positive attitude I really have towards the world. I try to smile naturally, because I often feel that the smile I have when I think about it seems fake. I want to be genuine and not overcompensate for my naturally angry look. I also try to have soft eyes because I will often squint or not open my eyes completely. I can also have judgmental eyes at times that have a way of giving condescending looks. By keeping this mantra in mind, I feel that I am able to more often express my inward happiness instead of my naturally indifferent and sometimes angry face.
I feel that my life has been greatly improved by my mantras. They give me perspective and help me to think clearly. Whenever I find myself questioning what I am doing or why I am stressed, I go through the three mantras and one of them will bring me to a solution. If it will not matter in ten years and I have given up being angry, then "Natural Smile, Soft Eyes".
I recommend coming up with mantras to everyone because it can help increase your focus and put everything into perspective. So will it matter in ten years? Should you really be nursing animosity and registering wrongs? Natural Smile, Soft Eyes.
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