Hey kids, time for a comprehensive list of all the parts of 2013 that were absolutely terrible aside from just the awful music that came out. My life actually had a bunch of awful, stressful, and just plain bad events that happened. For most of them, I am able to see them as a learning experience or something that can be turned around to be seen as something that is actually wonderful, but others were just horrible. Unfortunately, nobody likes a pessimist. Even my pessimistic jokes are not well received (I blame my audience) so I choose to see the silver lining whenever possible because I know it is what the people around me would like me to do. I have always been a pessimist, and it is not because I am unhappy, but rather because I refuse to settle. I am capable of being completely satisfied and happy, but I strive for perfection. I would rather not lie to myself or anyone else by saying I am perfectly content when I am not, because although it will take a while, I eventually will be. If I have even the slightest problem with something, I will fix it, because why settle when things could be better? Why buy a phone case that anybody could have when you can order your own and make it perfectly geometrically symmetrical? Why listen to a song on Pandora if you have ten other stations that could have an even better song? Why buy a skirt if you might just be able to find a better one at a cheaper price? Why take haphazard notes in class when they could be made color coded and orderly after class? I am willing to go the extra mile to make things better, and I will go the extra mile to be optimistic about all the things that were awful about 2013 even though it would me much easier to be a pessimist. So here it is, a list of everything that was terrible about 2013:
1. I Barely Read a Single Book
Alright, so this is not off to such a great start because I cannot possibly see anything good about not reading. It was mostly due to the fact that I was extremely busy with getting ready for college and attending college as well as having a part time job. By the time I actually have free time, I am too tired to focus on reading. I promised myself I would read several books over Winter Break, but I have not even picked one up yet (which is pathetic on my part). I remember telling people about the book I was "currently reading" last summer and it is still the book I am "currently reading". So there's that... moving on...
2. I was Extremely Fat
I am going to come out and say how fat I actually was. I, Jessica Bruso, will finally admit to the world just how bad I was. At my heaviest, I weighed 163 pounds and was pushing the limits of my size 8 pants and owned a few pairs of pants and dresses in size 10. The silver lining here is that I am no longer fat. I have lost twenty five pounds and I am back in a size 6 where I belong.
3. I Had my Wisdom Teeth Extracted
This was extremely painful and my wisdom tooth caused me to get a cavity in one of my teeth that I have to have filled in a few weeks. I guess the positive point in this is that the tooth with the cavity has no further damage than just that.
4. I Had to Make the Appointment for my Tonsillectomy
Technically, this will occur on the second of January 2014, but I felt the need to include it here because I suffered from my "cavernous" (as the doctor calls them) tonsils for years but 2013 was the year that they finally became so bad that removing them was deemed the only solution to the pain. I guess the good parts are that I won't have nearly as much pain when I get colds and that it is technically happening in 2014. Technically.
5. I Have Celiac (Or Something Like It)
This was definitely the event of the year. If my life were on the news, this would be considered "THE Story of The Year". I can't eat anything at parties (last week at a Christmas party I only had vegetables with ranch and shrimp... for dinner). I mostly dislike it because everywhere I go I have to be treated differently due to my dietary restrictions and nobody knows what I have so I have to explain it. Then everyone gets sick of me talking about it because I do not realize when I am rambling or talking about it too much (because frankly, nobody cares about it but me). Aside from the fact that I cannot eat anything, I did lose a lot of weight and I feel better than I ever have in my entire life. Come to think of it, it is easier to see the bright side about this.
6. I am Single
To be completely honest, I AM happier now than I was when I was in a relationship. The fact that I am single leaving 2013 but I was not when I entered it is somewhat sad to think about, though. I now see how much happier I am, but in general, nobody wants to be alone. However, I would rather be alone than be who I was with, but in general, I would not mind companionship. I mean, who wouldn't?
7. I Had to Leave Home
It is a part of growing up, but moving away from my parents was extremely difficult. It was terrible to say goodbye and see my mother cry. I hated being away from them for so long and I already dread having to leave them again, even though it will only be for four weeks next time I go to college. It makes me a stronger, more independent person, but honestly, I hate it.
8. In Summation, The Three Hardest Things I Have Ever Had to Do Occurred in 2013
The process of discovering I have Gluten Intolerance/making the switch to a gluten-free diet, dumping my first boyfriend, and leaving my parents were the hardest things I have ever had to do. They all happened within the span of just a few months. I guess in the end I am a stronger person. I am definitely stronger than I ever have been. I have learned how to manage my weight and my health as a result of learning about my Gluten Intolerance. I have learned how to control my relationships by (finally) gathering the strength to leave someone that I was afraid to live without even though I was unhappy. I learned how to take care of myself and all my responsibilities with nobody to give me reminders or encouragement.
With all things considered, 2013 was awful, and if I am being completely truthful, it was both the worst and best year of my life. I lost everything and gained everything at the same time. I lost all I knew and gained everything I now know. I lost my securities and found my independence. I lost my dependence on others for my happiness and learned how to be happy on my own. I lost who I was and found who I am, and although that process was completely and utterly awful, I wouldn't trade it for the world.
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